Hey all and welcome to another edition of Differently Wired;
the blog for all things Aspie! I’m sorry I haven’t updated in a long while, but
life has been rather busy as of late. I’m back though, so without further ado,
let’s get on with it!
Today’s blog entry is actually based on something that
happened to me recently. You see, in the past few months, I moved in with my
best friend in a fantastic new apartment building. Coincidentally, two of my
aunt and uncle (henceforth referred to as zia and zio due to my Italian
heritage)’s friends live in the building too, and one night as I was leaving,
some of their friends were coming off the elevator to pay them a visit. I was
just leaving my own unit when something unexpected happened. One of them; a
lady who my zia had been friends with for a long time, saw me and asked to
speak with me about something. She told me that her grandson has Aspergers and
that she would very much like my advice on how to approach the situation!
I’m rather ashamed to admit it, but I was engulfed by quite
a bit of emotional confusion upon being asked this. On the one hand, I was
honoured and thrilled to be able to do good and make a difference in someone’s
life. It is, after all, my motivation for writing this blog and for continuing to
be an outspoken activist for Aspie pride. On the other hand, I felt an emotion
which is all too human; fear. I was afraid that I was and would be considered
to be less of a person by her and angry that my zia seemed to talk about me
behind my back in such a way that one of her friends knew something very
personal about me. It was my secret to choose to share, dammit!
…at least, that’s how I felt at the time.
As the days went on, I thought more about the request, and
finally decided that I would do it. It was the right thing to do, and it would
help someone out who was in need. And you know what? As we sat down to have
coffee and discuss all things Aspergian, I feel like I truly got through to
someone. Many of the things I mentioned were things I’ve written about on this
blog, along with a heaping dose of Neurodiversity 101. I think what helped tie
it all together though was that my zia’s friend saw me, a fully-functioning
adult aspie with a good job and burgeoning writing career, and felt comforted
for her own grandson. To borrow a phrase from the LGBTQ community, it DOES get
better.
I guess what I’m trying to say with this entry is that, to
quote a very wise green puppet from a fictional universe, fear is the path to
the dark side. It’s extremely understandable, especially when it comes to
something like Aspergers, which isn’t widely socially understood or accepted.
That being said, we should never be afraid of being who we are. The only reason
people have the power to judge is because we give it to them through our fear.
If we proudly proclaim to all the Neurotypicals out there that we are proud to
be Aspies, then we effectively rob them of all power to judge us. The only way
to help the children growing up with Aspergers right now is for all of us adult
Aspies to take pride in ourselves and educate others.
After all, we must be the change we want to see in the
world!
(Also, I should really stop quoting famous people and
characters shouldn’t I?)
As always, yours in diversity,
Adam Michael
